The conservative case for making undocumented toddlers represent themselves in federal court

BY: @op_ed_politics4 HOURS AGO

FIG. 01 President Trump grips a courtroom podium with small hands while a wide-eyed four-year-old boy in oversized suit scribbles on a legal pad at the counsel table during immigration policy remarks.

Critics are crying foul over President Trump's decision to bypass Congress and defund legal aid for undocumented minors. But if a seven-year-old can't navigate federal immigration court alone, maybe they lack the entrepreneurial spirit this country was built on.

I was enjoying a perfectly seared branzino at Cafe Milano yesterday when a source close to the administration leaned over the white tablecloth and whispered the news. President Trump had just executed a "pocket rescission" to claw back nearly $1 billion in federal funding, neatly bypassing the tedious pearl-clutching of congressional approval. The mainstream media, predictably, has spent the last forty-eight hours hyperventilating because the canceled funds largely targeted Health and Human Services programs for undocumented immigrants and unaccompanied minors facing immigration court.

My dining companion sighed, bracing for the inevitable public outcry. But as I took another sip of a rather robust 2018 Châteauneuf-du-Pape, I realized someone had to step up and say the quiet part loud. It is time we admitted that stripping taxpayer-funded legal counsel from unaccompanied migrant children is simply good fiscal sense.

FIG. 02 The harsh realities of federal budget management are best understood over a perfectly executed piece of fish.

Let's be honest: we have coddled the undocumented toddler demographic for far too long.

SATIRE OF

The Hill · thehill.com

Trump rescinds nearly $1B in federal funding, bypassing congressional approval

President Trump cancelled almost $1 billion in federal funding Friday using the controversial “pocket rescission” process, which allows him to sidestep congressional approval. Most of the cancellations targeted Health and Human Services (HHS) programs serving undocumented immigrants and unaccompanied children in court, as well as similar initiatives under the agency’s Minority Health office and the…