The Insurance Institute for Business & Home Safety confirmed Thursday that its ongoing project of incinerating fully furnished model homes will finally align with global climate targets. The researchers plan to purchase carbon credits to offset the massive plumes of toxic smoke generated by their daily pursuit of structural safety.
The IBHS research facility in South Carolina routinely ignites full-scale residential structures inside a massive wind tunnel to simulate the ember storms of a warming planet. According to the institute’s latest sustainability disclosure, the intentional destruction of three-bedroom colonials currently accounts for the largest single source of Scope 1 emissions in Chester County.
We recognize the optics of emitting thousands of tons of greenhouse gases to study the localized effects of those same gases, which is why we are pledging to achieve carbon-neutral home immolation by 2040.
To achieve the new targets, the facility will purchase voluntary carbon offsets through the Gold Standard registry for every roof it purposefully collapses. The credits will reportedly fund a tree-planting initiative in Northern California, replacing acreage lost to real wildfires with saplings that future climate models suggest will also eventually burn.
Ahead of the next quarterly reporting deadline, the research team is currently constructing a fully LEED-certified, solar-powered duplex, which they plan to douse in accelerant and burn to the foundation on Tuesday morning.