Trembling visibly as he approached the main counter of the Naperville Public Library on Tuesday morning, 34-year-old local resident David Hemlock reportedly turned himself in for causing a minor tear on page 214 of a mass-market paperback.
Hemlock, who sources say waited until the checkout line had completely cleared before stepping forward, placed the battered copy of Lee Child’s "Make Me" gingerly on the return drop. Witnesses reported the patron kept his eyes fixed entirely on the linoleum floor while sliding the novel toward the desk, repeatedly apologizing for the structural damage he had inflicted upon municipal property.
He pushed the book across the counter with both hands and asked if I needed to hold onto his driver's license while I filled out the incident report.
The damage in question—a quarter-inch rip at the bottom margin that did not obscure any text—was reportedly sustained late Monday evening when Hemlock attempted to turn the page with a slightly clammy thumb. After taking a deep, shuddering breath, the patron offered to pay the full retail price of the nine-year-old paperback, surrender his borrowing privileges indefinitely, and accept a permanent ban from the facility.
At press time, Kowalski had reportedly smoothed the tear together with a single piece of matte Scotch tape, tossed the novel onto a reshelving cart, and asked Hemlock if he wanted his parking validated, prompting the man to quietly burst into tears of relief.