The global economy remains on hold as the Group of Seven enters its fourth hour of emergency talks regarding a missing multimedia adapter.
The Group of Seven summit was abruptly suspended Tuesday morning after the world's most powerful economic bloc realized nobody possessed the correct dongle to connect the French delegation's laptop to the conference room projector.
The crisis began at 9:15 a.m. local time when French President Emmanuel Macron attempted to share a 40-slide presentation on global tariff reductions. Witnesses report that after 20 minutes of passing a standard USB-C cable around the primary negotiating table, the bloc formally acknowledged that the venue’s primary display only accepted an HDMI input, prompting a total cessation of international diplomacy.
The combined economic output of the nations in this room is over 40 trillion dollars, yet we are entirely paralyzed because someone walked off with the little white Apple adapter that was supposed to be zip-tied to the podium.
According to highly placed sources, a brief moment of optimism occurred at 10:45 a.m. when Canadian Prime Minister Mark Carney produced a tangled adapter from his briefcase. This relief was quickly dashed when the delegation discovered it was a legacy VGA connector, rendering it useless for the current geopolitical climate. Japanese Prime Minister Sanae Takaichi reportedly suggested calling the hotel's front desk to ask if previous guests had left one in the lost and found, a motion that was quickly seconded by the United States and the United Kingdom.
At press time, the summit remained stalled as European Commission President Ursula von der Leyen attempted to broker a compromise wherein Macron would simply turn his 13-inch screen around so the leaders of the free world could huddle behind his chair and squint at the graphs.