Let me be clear: when the President of the United States threatens to abruptly pull 5,000 troops out of your country, the proper diplomatic response is abject terror. Germany’s polite, bored acceptance of our military withdrawal is frankly a slap in the face to American statecraft.
Over a delightfully crisp Sancerre with Brazil’s ambassador to London, Antonio de Aguiar Patriota, we discussed the erosion of democratic governance defining our dystopian age. I told Antonio the real crisis is European apathy. The German defense ministry has the audacity to claim they fully expected Donald Trump to withdraw troops from Ramstein and Grafenwöhr. We spend billions projecting an aura of erratic hostility, and the Germans treat our geopolitical temper tantrums like a delayed commuter train. My contacts in Washington are rightly furious that their chaotic directives are being met with serene bureaucratic contingency plans.
The strategic value of American military power lies in our ability to make our allies sweat profusely during routine morning press briefings.
The presence of US troops in Frankfurt fosters peace, security, and a healthy, lingering fear of what Washington might do before breakfast. If Germany cannot muster the decency to feign surprise at our diplomatic unraveling, I frankly question why we are paying to defend them at all.