An advanced interstellar strike fleet officially called off its subjugation of humanity on Tuesday morning after becoming permanently deadlocked at a standard four-way intersection.
The vanguard of 400 heavily armed dreadnoughts descended upon Waukesha, Wisconsin, shortly before 8:00 a.m. with the stated intent of harvesting Earth's resources and enslaving its population. However, the galactic campaign ground to an immediate halt at the corner of Grand Avenue and Wisconsin Avenue when the lead command ship arrived at a stop sign at the exact same moment as a 2014 Honda Civic, a municipal garbage truck, and a school bus.
Witnesses reported that the extraterrestrial conquerors spent roughly three hours politely inching forward, abruptly hitting their atmospheric thrusters, and waving their plasma cannons to signal the other commuters to proceed, resulting in a tense, motionless standoff that backed up morning traffic for nearly two miles.
You can possess all the dark-matter weaponry in the known universe, but if you don't understand that the vehicle on the right has the right-of-way, you have no business being on the road during the morning commute.
Intercepted transmission logs from the fleet's supreme commander revealed mounting psychological distress as the Honda Civic driver flashed his brights, a gesture the alien tactical computers failed to interpret as either a declaration of war or a polite yielding of the intersection. After the garbage truck driver angrily waved the mothership through, only to pull forward at the exact same time the aliens finally attempted to accelerate, the commander reportedly suffered a severe panic attack and ordered a full retreat.
Defense Department radar confirmed the armada executed an awkward, eight-point reversal over a nearby CVS Pharmacy before engaging their hyperdrives and fleeing the solar system entirely to locate a world with a more straightforward system of traffic circles.