Following a sixth consecutive defeat at Easter Road, Hibernian head coach David Gray confirmed he will continue presiding over dismal tactical collapses until the club's ownership actively prevents him from doing so. The manager issued the stark warning to supporters on Monday, clarifying that his reign of terror remains entirely in the hands of a paralyzed boardroom.
Speaking to reporters after the latest Scottish Premiership drubbing, Gray noted that he has left his office door ajar, packed his personal belongings into a cardboard box, and left his mobile phone off silent, yet no executive has stepped forward to relieve him of his duties. The 36-year-old stressed that until he receives direct written instruction to vacate the premises, he is legally obligated to keep fielding disjointed starting XIs that completely lack defensive awareness.
David has made it perfectly clear that he will continue to hemorrhage points in front of the home support until we find the courage to actually process his severance paperwork.
Sources within the locker room indicate Gray has increasingly escalated his attempts to force ownership's hand, recently experimenting with entirely inverted midfields and making quadruple substitutions in the fourteenth minute. Despite these blatant provocations, the club hierarchy has reportedly responded only by avoiding eye contact with the manager in the stadium corridors and hoping the poor form organically resolves itself before the January window.
At press time, a visibly exhausted Gray was seen sketching out a 2-5-3 formation for the upcoming weekend, praying that a historic home capitulation might finally prompt the board to intervene.